Stagnation — sucky, sticky and dull.

How do you know when your life is stagnating? Are any of these feel slightly familiar?

  • You appear to be listening to someone but your  brain is busy “Yah, yah, yah-ing” instead, and later you are busted for not listening?
  • Do you wander around your abode seeing only the a skuzzy skim of dust on everything. Actually, mores the question —are you wandering around a lot?
  • You know there is life outside but you can’t quite see through the almost-but-not-quite-transparent skuzzy skim coating the window?
  • You stand in the bathroom looking at the shower and wondering if it’s the skuzzy feeling inside or outside that needs removal first?
  • You step on the scale and, for the hundredth time, wonder if the gizmos inside have skuzzy-mucked together like two-day-old cold oatmeal?
  • Do you drive away from your home, wondering if you’ll come back, and if you do, why?
  • And finally, when you do return (and you know you really want to),  do you feel like a gerbil on a wheel in a cage?

When I catch myself in any of the above I know it’s time to shake something loose in my life. Most often it’s a little screw called focus that needs fiddling with. Somehow the focus has slipped. It has shifted from process to results. Instead of enjoying a process, things have become a ‘lets get ‘er done‘ job sucking me into a mindless loop of stinking ruts. I’ve lost my umph for life because it all seems—Gotta’ get the meals cooked. Gotta’ get a story written. Gotta’ get the cleaning finished quick. Gotta’ finish those crafts for the fair. Gotta’ practice my drawing…Hurry, Hurry!

Suddenly, everything needs to be done, AND just as suddenly, the joy has been sucked right out of everything and when there is no joy, what the hell is the point, and nothing gets done as well as it could be done.

Eventually I catch on to what is happening and I stop. I simple down. I breath. One breath, feel it move in and feel it move out. Cool air in, warm air out. In, out. My body relaxes, my mind quiets and I feel a calm seeping in. It doesn’t take long before I’m wanting to move again—only now I want to move with grace, not speed. I want back into the process of life.

That’s when I know my focus has moved back into the right groove and I am kissing  off those sticky tentacles of stagnation.

Ciao

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