Haircut or Hair Smut?

stubble

RULES ON HOW (not)TO GET A HAIR CUT

#1: You spot a new hair salon and because it’s located between a small engine repair shop and a gas station you think it’ll be reasonable.

Don’t.

I did that. And, even though they had these amazingly comfy massaging shampoo chairs, my ‘trim’ cost $45.00 and looked like it came from one of the lawnmowers in the repair shop.

#2: If a low-cost franchise salon is your next choice – proceed with caution. Even if you luck out and find a fantastic hairdresser, assume you’ll face a waiting list each visit.

#3: Now, if you are prepared to wait — don’t bring your partner along unless there is a coffee shop close by. Otherwise waiting becomes the enemy.

#4: Okay, let’s say you’ve ignored rule #3 — Please don’t let the enemy force you to take unwise action. Like tossing caution to the wind and going with the only available hairdresser who looks like she’d like to be somewhere else. She may be a nervous trainee. Or new to the country with only a meager grasp on the English language.

#5: So, say you’ve gone rogue and ignored #4 too — Trust me when I say — question that wide-eyed stare from the hairdresser when you tell her to ‘cut it two fingers high’. And, for god’s sake, make sure that you use show & tell with your fingers. Show her the two fingers are stacked, not side-by-side. (And don’t assume it’s normal that she mumbles in her native tongue the entire cut).

#6: Here’s the biggie —Don’t even for a single heartbeat think you can trust the gods-that-be enough to lean back and relax with your eyes closed. No. No. No. Eyes open, brain in gear.

#7: Second to last rule is more a peep of warning to the partner you took along —Do not smirkingly offer her your baseball cap when she comes out. Especially if your next ‘trim’ is due and she’s your hair cutter.

Yes, I am that childish. . .I didn’t want to be the baldest head in the mobile.

But it’s all good because . . .

#8: Hair grows.

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: