There once was a Luddite who texted. . .

My dear man of wonder is such a borderline Luddite that sometimes I am forced to play with it.

A while back I purchased a new phone, capable of everything but swinging on the monkey bars at recess and, since the old flip phone was still in excellent condition, I convinced Man-Wonder to take it over. After some intense cajoling he agreed, and I’m proud to say he’s up to texting six-letter words now. Mind you, he won’t use the camera, he won’t change tunes for the texts or phone messages and he definitely won’t change the picture on the home screen. He insists, “Everything is fine as is, why mess with it?”

The one thing he will do is erase messages. No multi deletes though. Nope, it is once a month . . and one. at. a. time. – a long drawn out painful procedure, peppered with curses and many mumbles about ‘someone having far too much to say’.

Since I’m the reason for his mumbles, and just before I left for the most recent ‘away’ jobs, I decided to really give him something to mumble about. I secretly set his phone up so each time he received a text my voice would loudly announce, “You got a message! You got a message!”

Then I went away for three days. Texting him as often as I could.

Day one and he was texting back as normal. Disappointing. When day two ended without any comments from him I figured I’d either messed up and wasn’t annoying the hell out of him or he’d been so horrified he’d figured out how to change it. Then came day three. Five thirty in the morning to be exact. I had just texted him a cheery good morning. My phone rang within two minutes.

“You know I love you, right? But I can’t handle your voice yelling at me all the time. How do I shut you up?”

Once I quit snickering I explained how to ‘erase’ me. We hung up and I went to work. Late that afternoon, on the drive back down island I sent him a text letting him know. I got a brief ‘Okay’ reply.  A bit later I sent another text with our eta and my drop-off spot. Within seconds my phone rang.

“Stop texting me!” Man-Wonder yelled in my ear. “I screwed up and somehow made you really, really loud and now you’re screaming at me when you text! And now the damn thing is vibrating too. JUST.STOP. TEXTING. PLEASE.”

I laughed all the way home and, yes, I had to text him a couple more times. . . after all – he could have turned his phone off. . .


  1. writeknit Said:

    LOL you are a hoot!!!


    • Gee thanks and I think it’s an awfully good thing dear hubby loves me even though I’m always poking at him.


  2. I’m cracking up here. I’ve never had a phone that did that but would have loved it when I was married. I think the old man died with the flip phone in his pocket. I know another old man that continues to use his and my son’s significant other continued using her flip phone until she got to cheap to replace it when it died and he gave her his smart phone. She hates it. 😉 They get stuck in how it always has been mode. Poor things. Proud of you for spicing it up for him. 🙂


    • i always figure things are only scary until you figure out how to do it. It’s like quilting really. Just takes practice and repeating steps until the lightbulb goes on.

      Liked by 1 person

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