Checkerboard creativity or idiot-ivity?

I’ve had too much time off this summer and too many hot days which led to too much thinking and pondering. My creative urges were starting to feel like someone was rubbing a stem of stinging nettle across my brain.

Hallelujah, last week the weather cooled and my energy returned and off to the carport I went dragging one tired wheeled cart inherited many many moons ago. At one time there was an electrical outlet attached to its top shelf and I remember there was always a kettle, toaster and teapot close by. Cups and saucers on the middle shelf and who knows what on the bottom. (At least while my aunt was alive. After she died Unk turned it into a moveable drink caddy, but then that’s another story in itself.)  It was now time for this baby’s rebirth. I was imagining crisp clean  glossy white.

Too bad it ended up looking like some hospital cast-off.

Then creativity whispered in my ear . . . black AND white.  I stared at it (the table, not my creativity) until I saw it – a checkerboard pattern on the shelves, two white legs with black dots, two black legs with white dots. The sudden rise in energy must have attracted Man-wonder because he wandered into the car port, saw the table and said, “I like it but you don’t do you?” (He does like to ask pointless questions I’ve noticed). I laid out the new plan.

“Uh uh. Don’t do it. Don’t you remember what you said last time you attempted painting a checkerboard pattern? You told me to tell you never to try it again”

Now, there are two things I know for sure. One – I have a piss-poor memory and two – that man’s middle name is pain-in-butt.

“Did you get it in writing? Did I make you swear to stop me?”

“No and no. But you did toss around some pretty nasty words.”

After a short silent staring session I said, (words dripping with disdainful dignity), “Phffffff! Don’t remember and, anyway, I’ve had lots of painting experience since whenever that was.”

Next morning, after he left for work, I spent time researching methods online just to be sure I knew what I was doing. Preparation is half the work and can cover up a few fibs, right? Four hours later I had two shelves done and I was looking at the third with no passion whatsoever. Sadly, I knew the following day would be spent touching up almost every freaking square and the day after that – touching up my touching ups. Besides, the dotty legs were looking a bit disease-y.

When Man-wonder came home, and yes, he had to walk past my painting efforts, he was wise enough to not say “I told you so.” And I was disheartened enough to let him hug me while he promised to tie my hands behind my back the next time I discovered a checkerboard pattern I simply had to do. And then the man with the memory said, still mid-hug, “Hey, remember that old desk we had in the basement on Furn Rd? Remember the fun you had painting it? You threw a bunch of different colors at it and it turned out pretty cool didn’t it? And I still remember that huge couch you had when we first met. It was covered in a splatter paint fabric right? You loved that couch.”

“OMG! I’d forgotten. Splatter-painting! My couch!” I gave him a big squeeze. “And they wonder why I call you Man-wonder.” Then I smacked him. “Why didn’t you remember all that before?”

Well, I splatter-painted the heck out of that table and I may never put anything on it ever again. . . I love it! Something satisfying about a controlled mess . . . table for blog


. But . . . here’s the thing – our sun porch floor needs  a new paint job and I am sorry to say I saw one done in a soft grey and white checkerboard pattern that set my soul singing and I think I could do it, for two reasons

  • First – let’s not call it checkerboard, let’s call them painted tiles.
  • And, since the sun porch isn’t big and the tiles would be . . . I could easily do it in one Man-wonder working day.

I know. I KNOW . . . a bit like the monkey never learns on my part right?


  1. I love the splatter paint look. I redid a china cabinet a few years ago with a technique called pickling which meant there would be no flat looks. You can see the photos of the finished project here.
    I absolutely know the feeling of a project well done. I don’t have a man wonder so it’s all on me. I think that’s why I contemplate so much. I’m thinking for 2. :))


    • I like the look of your cabinet too. Excellent idea for a large piece of furniture. Imagine what your cabinet would look like if done like my table?! Oh my! I think your room would vibrate! So good choice!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you for your thoughts on the cabinet. That technique you used might be more to my daughter’s liking on my china cabinet. She’s not fond of the outcome. Not sure what she will do with all the china she will inherit. 😉 It needs a cabinet. I hated the dark walnut finish on it from the 60’s but it was excellent wood. Yours is really fun though. 😉


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