Cramming the vote (and the possibility of brain implosion)

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A while back I signed up to be a deputy returning officer in the federal by-election which happened earlier this month here in town. The whole process was a tad intimidating – thanks to government and its love of paperwork.

One week prior to the election we attended a training session and at the end of the training session we were handed a BIG WHITE BAG. (Think ‘Shrek’. Picture Shrek going to the beach. Imagine the size of his beach bag!)

Why so big? Because it contained every form, envelope and piece of equipment deemed necessary for a government procedure (before, during and after). It also contained an instruction book with more pages than an average-sized cozy whodunit.

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We were told to study the contents that evening and twice more before the big day.

So, being me, most of the following week I would walk past the BIG BAG, ignoring the pangs of doom and fear:

  • Doom because I still owned my life-long habit of last minute cramming.
  • Fear of no longer having enough active brain cells to handle a cram session.

I tell you – that bag gave me the willies!

Finally – the day before the election – I spread all the bag contents across our bed and opened to the first page of the instructions praying I ‘got it’ before my brain imploded.

Happily the brain cells functioned as requested and election day was a hoot!

My co-conspirator and I handled the contents of the BIG BAG like pros (happy, grateful idiots?) and the only issue that came of the whole day was the state of my body after sitting for 14 hours . . .

. . . I’m still in the middle of a heavy-duty discussion between my arthritic joints, crampy muscles and pumped up brain cells over signing up for the BIG federal election happening this fall . . .

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